


The Measure of Courage

by hollyandvice (hiasobi_writes)



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: M/M, Misunderstandings, Mutual Pining, Truth Spells
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-31
Updated: 2020-01-31
Packaged: 2021-02-27 11:27:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,495
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22486330
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hiasobi_writes/pseuds/hollyandvice
Summary: Truth spells are the literal worst, but they're even worse than normal when Steve's the one getting hit with them. The thought of being hit by one again has been even worse since he realized exactly what it is that he feels for Tony. Which is what's making this day even worse than normal.Steve gets hit with a truth spell that compels him to share his deepest, most closely kept secret. He's pretty sure there's a way to get around it, he just... doesn't know what it is. With his life on the line, though, the team isn't about to let him risk it.
Relationships: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Comments: 14
Kudos: 194
Collections: POTS (18+) Stony Stocking 2019





	The Measure of Courage

**Author's Note:**

  * In response to a prompt by [coaster](https://archiveofourown.org/users/coaster/pseuds/coaster) in the [stony_stocking_2019](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/stony_stocking_2019) collection. 



> Written for Coaster's prompt:
> 
> _"I love you!"//"I... wait, what?"_
> 
> Hope you enjoy, my dear!!

Truth spells are the literal worst. They tend to lead to Steve benching whoever is inflicted with them and Tony tearing his hair out trying to figure out a non-magical way around the spell. Once it had been a truth serum that Bruce had been injected with. Being able to find a scientific way around it had just about made Tony's entire month. Bruce had been amicable enough about the whole thing, letting Tony poke and prod him until they'd come up with an antidote to the serum.

Tony hadn't been able to shut up about how fascinating the internally replicating something-or-other had worked for a week. Steve had smiled and nodded indulgently but hadn't really listened much past the first three times Tony had brought it up.

So, yes, truth spells are the literal worst, but they're even worse than normal when Steve's the one getting hit with them. The thought of being hit by one again has been even worse since he realized exactly what it is that he feels for Tony. Which is what's making this day even worse than normal.

Tony had been laid up with three days left on his Steve-mandated bed rest for the bruised ribs he got a week ago. That had meant it was the rest of the team trying to dodge the sorceress' spells in Midtown. It had meant Steve had been the unfortunate recipient of the last shot to the chest that the sorceress had thrown. And it had meant that Steve had immediately shut down his communication on the coms lest he say something damning that Tony might hear.

Of course, that had meant Tony had started immediately shouting at him over the coms from his bed to _get over yourself Rogers, this team needs you to lead them right now or so help me—_

Steve had smiled and gotten right back to work. Nothing like Tony's voice in his ear to kick his ass into gear.

It had been mercifully easy to settle everything after that, and Steve had assumed Strange would be able to undo the spell just as soon as they'd brought him the surprisingly docile sorceress. He'd been wrong.

"What do you _mean_ you can't undo it?" Steve snapped.

Strange had eyed the girl with interest. "I mean I can't undo it."

"Bullshit you can't. You're the Sorcerer Supreme. The hell you can't undo this girl's work."

Strange slanted his eyes over to Steve sharply. "Are you sure you want to press that, Captain?"

"Strange—"

"Because you might not like what I have to say about it."

That shuts Steve up.

"You have a secret you're keeping inordinately close to the chest. That's what this spell needs. For you to share that truth with the person it's being kept from. Then you'll be free of its grip."

Steve stops short. "What?"

Strange's eyes flash. "You know what I'm talking about Captain Rogers. Handle it, or the spell will handle it for you." Then he tugs the girl inside and slams the door shut behind her.

Steve purses his lips and turns on his heel to see the rest of the team staring up at him in varying states of disbelief. "Right, then," Steve says, making his way down the stairs and pushing through his team. "Back to the Tower it is."

Tony grabs him by the elbow to stop him the second he walks out of the elevator back at the Tower. Of course it's Tony. Practically everyone else knows by now, and the only person that he's actively keeping the information from is Tony himself. So of course it's Tony that stops him. Steve pulls up short but doesn't turn to face his second-in-command. "What the hell was that about, Steve? You keeping more secrets now?"

"Yes." Tony releases him, and when Steve turns back to Tony, he can see the betrayal in his eyes. Heart in his throat, Steve's mind fils with images of Tony, devastated beyond belief by things Steve had never wanted him to know. "Not like that, Tony. God, nothing like that."

"But it's something bad."

Steve swallows and looks away. "It's something personal."

"Bullshit." Steve startles and turns back to Tony. "You don't keep secrets, Rogers. Not unless they can break things. If it can be destroyed by the truth, it deserves to be destroyed. I learned that a long time ago. Don't make my mistakes."

The words push against the back of Steve's throat, desperate to be shared. "Don't ask me to do that Tony. Not here. Not in front of everyone."

Tony's eyes go wide. "So it's just for one person." His voice is desperate and delicate as he asks.

"Yes."

"And you don't want anyone else to know."

"Yes."

Tony swallows. Steve can see the way his throat works above the line of the suit. "Right. Okay then." He takes a step back. "You need a lift anywhere?"

"No," Steve says, heart dropping into his stomach. "No, I... I don't."

Tony's jaw goes tight. "Right. Well then."

It's more telling than anything else he could have said, and it twists Steve's gut altogether too tightly. This isn't going to end well.

Tony marches to the elevator, and Steve can tell without looking that he's headed down to the third sub-basement that holds his personal lab. Steve tries not to let that hurt. He turns away, ready to head back to his floor to try to get away from the pain of Tony's abandonment, only to come face-to-face with Nat.

"You're going to tell him."

"No I'm not." Steve winces. It's enough of an admission for Nat to know exactly what it is that he'd hiding. He doesn't bother backtracking or trying to cover his words. The spell won't let him anyway.

Nat's eyes narrow. "Yes, Steve, you are."

"It's not fair to him."

"What, you standing around fucking yourself over until the spell kills you?" Nat scoffs. "That's bullshit, Rogers, and you know it."

"Nat—"

"No, you listen to me, Steve, and you listen good. You are going to march down to that lab, look him in the eye, and tell him the truth."

"To what end?"

"To save your ass! You think Tony wants you dead, Steve?"

"He's never really forgiven me for Bucky."

"Bullshit. You think he would have helped Barnes recover if he hadn't forgiven you? Tony never does anything he doesn't want to do, and he sure as shit doesn't help people he doesn't like or is holding a grudge against. And believe me, he can hold a grudge with the best of them."

Steve stares at Nat, hope warring with disbelief in his stomach. _You don't mean that._ "You actually mean that."

Nat raises an eyebrow, only to parse what he means after a moment. She rolls her eyes. "Yes, Steve, even when not under the influence of a spell, I can occasionally be compelled to tell the truth."

Steve's throat goes tight. "Nat—"

"Trust me, Rogers." Her face goes soft. "If you trust me on anything, trust me on this. Tell him."

"But—"

"Go."

Steve does.

Tony's at one of the many consoles in his lab, fingers flying over holographic keys. It's just as beautiful a sight as he's ever seen, and he can't help the way he leans against the open door to the lab. The music is loud enough to give anyone else a headache, but Steve's spent enough time down here that it doesn't really bother him anymore. His had thunks against the door frame, the easy contentment in his stomach warring with the desire to run away and never tell Tony the truth.

"Done that quickly?" Tony asks.

Steve startles. "What?"

"With Nat. You done already?"

Steve frowns. "What are you talking about?"

Tony's still rolling his eyes when he turns to face Steve. "That's what your secret was about, wasn't it? It's about you and Nat."

Steve blinks, feeling, as he so rarely does these days, like the idiot to Tony's genius. "What?"

Tony blinks. "It wasn't for Nat?"

"What wasn't for Nat?"

"Your secret."

"My secret?"

Tony rolls his eyes and gets to his feet, crossing the room to his work table. "Your secret was how you feel about Nat. Wasn't it?"

"Of course not."

Tony freezes. "What do you mean of course not? I know how you feel about her."

"How I feel about her?"

"Yes, how you feel about her. Dammit, Steve, did the damn spell take your critical thinking too? Repeating everything I say doesn't change what I've said. "

Steve bristles at the implication. "I'm not an idiot, Tony, you're just not making any sense. What do you mean how I feel about Nat?"

"Well, you love her, aren't you?"

"Of course I do."

Tony nods, like that settles everything. "There you go. So you told her and...?"

"She already knew that. Knows that. Everyone knows that. I love all of you."

Tony rolls his eyes again, and Steve almost snarks at him that if he keeps it up he'll get his eyes stuck like that. Tony speaks before he can say anything, though. "Right, of course you do. But you're _in love_ with Nat."

That pulls Steve up short. "I am?"

"Course you are. It's obvious."

"Obvious to who?"

"To anyone with eyes."

Steve shakes his head, trying to wrap his mind around the twists and turns this conversation has taken. "What are you talking about?"

Tony seems to understand a split second before Steve does. "Wait. That wasn't the secret you've been keeping?"

"No. Of course not."

"Then what... Then who is it?"

"Who's what?"

"Who's the secret for?"

"You." The word is past Steve's lips, pulled by the power of the spell.

Tony's face goes hard and he turns away. "Right. So it is bad news."

"You're going to think so."

Tony's back goes tense. "Let me be the judge of that."

"I can't tell you, Tony. I can't. Please, don't ask that of me."

Tony slams something down on the workbench. A wrench, maybe. It doesn't matter. "And don't ask _me_ to stand here and let you kill yourself. Tell me, Steve."

"Don't ask me that."

Tony whips around, eyes wide and wild. "Dammit, Steve, I'm not going to be the reason you die!"

"And I'm not going to be the cause of your pain."

"Why the hell not? You've done it before."

Steve reels back, struck by the vitriol in the words. "I know. I'm sorry."

Tony sighs, running a hand through his hair. "That was shitty of me."

"Yeah, it was," Steve says before Tony can say anything else.

Tony laughs. "Good to know the truth spell is working."

Steve shakes his head. "It is, but I'm still not about to tell you."

"Steve—"

"No, Tony, don't. Please, just. Just don't."

"Why not? Is the secret that bad?"

"It's not the secret that's bad, it's what comes after."

"You mean the part where I punch you in the face for whatever it is?"

"No. The part after that." Steve looks up and meets Tony's eyes head on, heart in his throat. "The part where you decide you don't want me in your life anymore."

"What?" Tony looks floored. "Why the hell would I want that?"

"Because. You don't want what I want."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means I want things you don't want."

"No, I get that, but what does that _mean_?"

"Tony—"

"Because if there's anything that you want, you know I'd do it for you in a heartbeat if we just talk about it."

"Not this, Tony. You won't do this."

"How the fuck do you know?"

"Because I know you. I know what you want and I know how you think and I know that this secret has the power to break us. I won't let it. I'll... I'll find another way."

"Bullshit you will," Tony snaps. "I got through to Strange after you all left him and he made it very clear what the consequences would be if you didn't follow through in this. So whatever it is, keeping it a secret can't be more important than your life."

"I won't burden you with this."

"Bullshit you won't, Steve, just fucking tell me."

"No."

"Why the hell not?"

"Because I love you!"

Tony scoffs. "You love everyone, Steve, that's not a secret. That's no reason not to tell me something."

"No, you deliberately dense motherfucker, I'm _in love_ with you!"

Tony stops. Blinks at Steve. Frowns. Blinks again. "I... Wait, what?"

Steve stops short. The tightness in his chest has eased, and it only takes that split second between Tony's question and him opening his mouth to realize that the spell has passed. That he's free.

That he can lie.

He looks away. "Nothing. It's nothing."

"See, now I know you're full of shit, because I've never seen you go that pale that fast, and I'd be willing to bet Barnes never has either."

Steve swallows and forces himself not to close his eyes. "It's nothing."

Tony steps around in front of him, looking up into his eyes. "Steve. You know I'll put up with a lot from you. Your occasionally shitty leadership and your ill-advised jibes and your constant sass. All of that and more. But the one thing I won't put up with from you is you pretending you're a coward." Tony takes a step closer. Steve has to force himself not to take a step back. Tony seems to take that as a win, if the light in his eyes is any indication. "So please, Steve. Don't be a coward in this either."

Steve licks his lips. Tony's gaze doesn't stray from Steve's eyes. In anyone else, it would be a damning sign, but in Tony it only speaks to his seriousness. Steve's heart goes tight and, for a second, anything seems possible. He lets himself speak.

"I love you, Tony Stark. I love you."

Tony makes a sound, something broken and exhilarated in the same moment. Hurt and so damn hopeful at once. Then Tony's surging up on tiptoes, pressing his mouth to Steve's. Steve puts his arms around Tony's waist instinctively, pulling him closer. He lifts a hand to cup Tony's cheek and gentle the kiss. Tony whines against him but lets him take charge, lets him soften the press of lips until there's nothing desperate in the kiss.

"Tony—"

"I love you too, Steve Rogers." The knot of uncertainty in Steve's chest loosens. "So damn much."

Steve laughs weakly, leaning forward to press his forehead against Tony's shoulder. "Promise?"

Tony laughs, warm and bright and filling Steve up to the brim. "You didn't know?"

Steve pulls back. "God, Tony, of course not. If I'd known— God, I'd have made a move so much sooner."

Tony whimpers. "Well then. Guess we have some time to make up for."

"Yeah," Steve whispers against his lips. "Yeah, I guess we do."


End file.
